Category Archives: Pieces of Me

Happily Ever After, Romantically speaking

I met her in January 2008…that’s right I said her…at a bar…meeting someone at a bar…is it cliche or is it impossible?  I think there is a division on the topic but this impossible cliche happened to me!

I knew three things were for sure the first night I saw her…

1. My love for argyle was deep. That argyle sweater she was rocking completely complimented her dark rimmed glasses and alternative lifestyle haircut.

2. As she removed that argyle sweater revealing a white t-shirt and tattoo of a daisy on the under side of her bicep…I knew tattoos were definitely not tacky and white trash…they were hot.

3. And I needed to know her.

I think it is important to announce on this blog that….I ELOPED!  Almost three months ago…One thing that was missing from this blog was personality – mine…I was finding it hard to write because I was leaving bits and pieces of my little world out…Namely my wonderful partner and now legally married spouse, Lisa.  With this new revelation and life event…I’d like to renew my vows to blogging about music, being vegan, life and now married life…

It’s hard to say when happily ever after begins, romantically speaking, of course.  Is it the moment you meet the person you’re going to spend your life with or the day you say “I do”?  There are thousands of moments in the middle of those two events that are amazing and life changing…not to mention the pitfalls and broken hearts while kissing all those frogs…Could one of those moments have triggered ‘happily ever after’?…Maybe we don’t need to mark our happily ever after date…In Disney movies, the princesses always lives ‘happily ever after’ at the end of the movie…we don’t get to see it…it begins after the movie ends.

I took some other big steps in 2013 like coming out to my parents – fear had me a holding pattern for a long time.  I didn’t do everything perfect nor did I say all the right things…my only regret is that I missed out on some love and support that I thought I would lose.  So whenever happily ever after officially began, I look forward to sharing it with you!

HeatherLisa (23)

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Happy Blogiversary

I started this blog on the 2nd day of 2012…my intention was to chronicle the lengths I would go to and my attempts to pay off my law school loans because I was sure it was going to be comical…and I was sure that I’d have tons of time to work extra gigs and such…but turns out that there aren’t that many hours in a day…I did try my hand at being a part-time process-server, a recreation assistant for seniors and even some personal assistant work…I played the lottery…entered sweepstakes contests…filled out store surveys offering cash prizes but to no avail…so I quickly grew bored with my personal tragedies…and moved on to the fun things in life-like – vegan food, music and sharing life’s little moments…the name “Vegan Though You’re Not” really came from an angsty place…a friend was really negative about my choice to go vegan and it really frosted my vegan cookies…so my blog was reborn!  I’m not sure that friend even knows the blog exists or that I was even bothered by her words…and that’s OK because I think the blog has surpassed its angst ridden ways…hopefully it has improved my creative writing skills which have been sorely lacking the last few years due to that four-year stint using only legalese…I wouldn’t say I am the world’s most consistent blogger…vowing to do better will do me no good…it will serve to only ensure that I stop blogging all together…so I resolve to be happy with what I’ve created!

One milestone – I did get almost 200 hits one day because Chely Wright retweeted a post I wrote…my first celebrity retweet too!

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I look forward to sharing more…Thank you for reading…

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A new year…

Day 7 and I’m finally ready to start the new year…in words…Today is the first Monday of the new year so the new year really started today?  Am I right?

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While what is to come in 2013 is yet to be seen, the days, weeks and months of 2012 have passed…its mysteries revealed…The well intentioned resolutions for 2012 were about promises to love, to be honest, to be open, to be kind, to be proud, to let go of past wrongs, to improve, to do, to act, to achieve…

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The little blue box contained all of the wishes, hopes and promises for 2012.  Though I couldn’t remember every one, a few stuck out to me and were constantly on my mind throughout the year.  The goals met and resolutions kept were tossed in to the fire in celebration.  After every slip was read, only a few items were left unfulfilled…

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One resolution was even accomplished on New Years Day…

IMG_1602If you had told me that I would be running a 5K on New Years Day morning instead of nursing a wicked hangover, I would have laughed at you and not with you…I didn’t run the whole thing but I am getting closer with every run.

The goals, resolutions and commitments that remain in the little blue box get a second go this year…along with new entries for this new year…Happy New Year…Cheers!

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Challenge Accepted

You know how on How I Met Your Mother – Barney randomly accepts challenges that no one actually gives him…

Well that is where I find myself today…I accepted my own challenge to listen to the unabridged Les Miserables before the film is released on Christmas day…People always want to finish the book before they see the movie…so then I guess they can complain about how the movie is nothing like the book and how the screenwriters, directors and producers screwed up…but that will not be me…I just want to pay the author and this classic the respect it deserves…I’ve tried reading the unabridged text on and off but I’ve never dedicated the time like I should.  It is an incredibly long book…However, the first time I saw the Dream cast perform on PBS I was hooked…

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I wanted to be Eponine on Broadway…So she dies at the barricade and doesn’t get the guy…she has the best songs…plus Lea Salonga has one of the best voices I’ve ever heard…when I saw the trailer for the new film…again I was captivated by the voices and the music of Boublil and Schonberg….

The unabridged audiobook is 57 hours…I’m probably only a quarter of the way through…with only ten days left until Christmas there are those with doubts (Patty)…but it will be done…

Let’s pause for a moment to enjoy another clip from the movie….

The fact that everyone sang live and that there will be no songs dubbed in…well that is just amazing…there have been film adaptations of Les Miserables before but I am confident that this will be the best yet.  I’ll update on my progress and on anything French I decided to do to prepare!

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December Remembers….

Today (12/10)…it has been 7 years…the tears have dried and the sadness waned…but there is an empty space in memories, in pictures, in chairs, at occasions and even conversation…in trips down memory lane the space is filled…but the memories have a cut off date…they stopped for me on Thanksgiving day 2005…some people got a few more days but not much more…It’s amazing how one adjusts to that space…for it can never be filled and it is always there…It has to be…because you’ve lost a person that can never be replaced by another…My brother passed away 7 years ago from a drug overdose…I’ve long compartmentalized parts of my life so I don’t offend people, bring up painful memories, shock and amaze…but I’ve reached a crossroads where I don’t see the point…I’m not saying that I’ll put it all on the table any time soon…However, I wanted to find a way to tie in my other blog with my new blog…so this feels like the perfect segue…I started a blog a few years back dedicated to addiction, grief and all the gunk that comes a long with being related to an addict…but it came to feel like it either would become wallowing or soap boxy…I didn’t think either would be helpful…Below are excerpts from an old entry about the day I found out my brother was gone…

…I hung up the phone…relived the conversation with C…then began speculating the reason for the impromptu jaunt to Columbia…it’s only an hour drive and popular Saturday activity for my mom to shop with me…but I went to far sinister places quickly…Uncle G was with mom – my first thought was that Grandaddy was dead…but then why would Uncle G have driven with mom…someone would need to be with Granny…so then I guessed you were dead…but brushed it off…maybe someone was in the hospital…or these guys just wanted to head down to Yesterday’s in Five Points for dinner…

Mom was sitting on the steps of the apartment building when I arrived…Uncle G was silent except for saying to me…that it was really bad or that it wasn’t good…I knew already anyway…I was just waiting for the words…

“He’s dead,” said matter-of-factly…but really what other way is there to say it…I think I yelled, “no, no, no” or something similar…I remember C’s hand flying to her mouth then immediately backing out of the room…at a loss for words…I hate she was there…not b/c I didn’t want her there but…come on, that’s awkward…

I’m not sure if I lost my vision, my ability to hear (as a result of a mild panic attack and shock), or just immediately tuned out…which apparently is my initial reaction to most things…I immediately wanted to be alone but I couldn’t…they were there and wanted to comfort me…but I needed a minute to breathe…It didn’t come….mom was feverishly packing my clothes…I wanted to do it myself…I know I just needed to control the situation…but I felt like I was watching it happen in slow motion…I was grasping at anything to give myself a sense of control and balance in this chaotic moment…I had to ride with them leaving my car behind and the hope of a desperately needed hour alone to check in with myself…calm myself, make a plan for dealing with two grieving parents and the rest of the family…Mom put her head in my lap and cried most of the way home…we had to make a few calls on that drive some I remember, some I still don’t…

There is a lot that I don’t remember about those initial hours…but I knew our lives would never be the same again…our worst fears had come true…the years of jumping at phone calls that came at odd hours…the wait to see how many days you would go missing hoping that you weren’t in an alley…preparing mentally for the time that the phone or doorbell rang to deliver the news…preparing to help cope…but hoping that the news would never really come…

Years have passed since that day and I look now to celebrating in some small way the life that ended…My brother would have turned 30 this year…and even though he will be perpetually 23…I wanted to mark the milestone with a gift…something fun to remember…so I got a tattoo…I feel that at 33 I have reached an age to finally make lifelong decisions…Music makes me happy…it enters my mind constantly and I can tie a song to most events in my life…so I chose music notes but not just music notes…notes to Green Day’s song Good Riddance…

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Hope you had the time of your life…

There isn’t much you can do about a person sized hole in your life…it’s kind of like the phrase…pink elephant in the middle of the room…there is no way to look around it or ignore it…sometimes it makes other people uncomfortable…even though you’re past the shock of it…but if you’re the person on the path to leave the person sized hole in someone’s life…you can do something about it…If you’re reading this, you still have time…If you think no one cares, you’re wrong…If you think the people you get high with care, they don’t (well not in the way they should)…If you think recovery is hard, you’re right…but it’s possible…being sober won’t solve all of your problems but it could save your life…

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#WhitneyWednesday

I was devastated when I thought Whitney was not going to be picked up for a second season…and then I had to experience that intense emotion all over again when the season 2 premiere was delayed.  I am now filled with joy that it will air on Wednesday night instead of Friday night…I’m not saying I wouldn’t watch it on a Friday…but I am saying that it would probably be via DVR on Saturday mornings while I rehydrate…My point is that I watch Whitney and you should too!

Whitney Cummings is my new Carrie Bradshaw/Rachel Green/Kelly Kapowski/Joey Potter…television has always provided me with me fictional solutions to life’s problems in 30 minutes to an hour…I am not even sure I would have made it out of middle school without the wisdom of Zack Morris…

Jessie Spano and her caffeine pill freak out on Saved by the Bell…

Where would I have been without Dawson’s Creek while I was in college…I obviously went to an emotionally stunted high school…

…something dramatic happening on Dawson’s Creek montage…

And the timeless Friends…Nothing gets me through a sleepless night or no pants Sunday like episodes of Friends…

…Ross bringing new life to the word pivot while moving a couch on Friends…

Carrie Bradshaw became my fashion, love and life guru in my early 20s when I wasn’t to lazy for high heels and liked my drinks pink…

…Aiden screaming “You broke my heart!” when Carrie goes to win him back on Sex and the City

Other shows have come and gone…mostly alienating me with weird subplots, untimely deaths (you know who you are L Word and Grey’s Anatomy) but last year along came Whitney…I was instantaneously on board because of my love of the Chelsea Lately show…I’ll admit the first two episodes didn’t have me hooked…but I wanted the show to be great…because I like the cast so I hung on…I think people in their mid to late 20s and early 30s will find most of the situations and conversations hit hilariously close to home…instead of using words that will fail to adequately describe my adoration…below is a scene from my favorite episode of Whitney from Season 1…

Episode 6: Two Broke up Guys

Ok…so that didn’t work out so well..I’ve tried posting the video numerous…times…just click here – Watch the video called Drunken Confessions.  Enjoy.

Just watch it!  Season 2 premiere on NBC tonight at 8:00 PM!

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Taken to the cleaners…

My favorite errand – going to the dry cleaners…actually, it’s picking up my clothes that brings me the most joy. I’m not sure why it gives me an instantaneous high to pick up my clothes…but the errand doesn’t feel like work and I never whine about my extra stop on the way home…it has become a party of my regular routine…It did occur to me one day that I am lucky to have something to dry clean and a reason to have it dry cleaned…At some point in my adolescence taking clothes to the dry cleaners became a mark of success…maybe it was movies and television…an assistant continuously picking up dry cleaning for their boss…well I’m not the boss but I finally have a job where business attire is required…It is a constant reminder that life is good even when itso I make my bi-weekly treck to the dry cleaners to drop off and pick up my clothes all in one day…cash only because that’s how they roll…so if you see a girl with her dry cleaner bag swung over her shoulder with an extra pep in her step…it’s just me picking up my dry cleaning!

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Distraction…Canine Style

Sometimes this dog just makes me smile…and I’m pretty sure he is the cutest sleeper ever.  I noticed that all of the photos I take of him are while he is having a nap.  He does not appreciate the I-Phone camera like I do and usually looks away – maybe he has a fear the camera will capture his soul and is unable to relay that to me…In any event, I have been able to capture a few full face moments with him…

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Vegan Though You’re Not…

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When I decided to go vegan it’s not a decision that I took lightly…I had always flirted with vegetarianism through my natural likes and dislikes of certain foods…but I had to spend time thinking about what it meant for me to become a vegan…what beliefs I hold…was it the right thing for me physically, socially, ethically and mentally…and how that all fit together…because if I am making a lifestyle change it has to be something believe in…

So what do I believe in?

I believe in the circle of life…in science…in progress…in God…in evolution… And the realization that I came to was all of  those things afford me choice…and even free will…and none mandates me to eat animals…I don’t have a primal urge to go kill my food…any primal instinct in my lineage is long gone…I do believe that humans are omnivores based on certain functions that the human body performs and the need for a few vitamins that aren’t reliably found in plant based foods…whether that was an initial design or an adaptation based on necessity – I’ll leave that to the scientists… but just because my body can digest animal products doesn’t mean it has to do so…I do not live in an area or a time period that vegetation is scarce…there are plenty of fruits, vegetables, nuts, legumes, spices and even supplements – to give me what I need nutritionally and don’t include hormones or chemicals…It is true that I enjoy food for more than just substance to keep my body functioning…I’ve always known food as a social activity with friends and family, an experiment in taste, and an edible art form… and I was given a brain and two hands to combine all of these wonderful things into something nutritious and delicious…so what I’m given is a choice…to choose not to eat living things…and I make that choice not with vanity, hate or judgment but with an open mind and a loving heart…

They say you shouldn’t talk about religion, money or politics in social situations…apparently dietary choice should be added to the list…in discussing my choice I’ve been given support from close friends and family even if they have little understanding of what it means…and I’ve been asked, “Why?” with innocence and disgust and one friend even seemed a little angry.  Some people may find it different…strange…weird…whatever adjective you want to use for not being status quo…so their reactions are probably how they respond to change and differing opinions in general…I get this…I do…And realize that it isn’t me or veganism that is the problem – It’s their attitude…I don’t feel judgmental about people who choose not to be vegan because it is so personal…so to those who are a little judgy…I say…even though you’re not vegan, I am going to be and I am still me. 

I do tend to sound a little proud when I talk about the foods I’ve learned to make…but that’s because I am…  

To me becoming vegan is an adventure every day…it’s not a burden…nor does it leave me hungry like your average quick fix diet…I’m still learning, growing and building my vegan foundation…I’m not being forced into it nor would I ever force or guilt someone into veganism…and if you’re worried about my B-12 consumption, I take a supplement…and if you wonder what I’ll wear…well there is a wonderful world of clothing out there that is sans animal product and by-product…and then there is the realization that there are some things that are out of my control and all I can do is my part…

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And the winning numbers are….

A wise person or someone with a gambling problem once said – You can’t win, if you don’t play….

I don’t think Clark Howard would approve of using a lottery strategy to pay off my debts but what is a girl to do when the full-time job doesn’t pay ALL of the bills…A few co-workers and I decided we wanted to be like the group of school district employees who have won the lottery twice…Our strategy is simple – WIN…That isn’t fool-proof enough for you?  Well my friends – the lottery is a game of chance…we can come up with strategies…meditate…consult psychic advisers…or pull our numbers out of a hat…but the odds are one in millions…that’s right million with an S…We have our favorite numbers…and some even came from a fortune cookie…but they could be our lucky numbers – one day…

My lottery day dreams take me to a wonderful world where all of my debt – Sallie Mae included – is paid off.  So far we’ve only won  back $18.00 but we play on…

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